Balancing the atmosphere of your reception
Feb 20th, 2007 by Jimmie Malone
The article to the right was sent to me by a family member years ago, probably as a joke because of what I do for a living. It’s a good read though, and if you’re struggling with putting together music for your wedding you may get a kick out of it (just click on it to see the full size version). The fact is that most couples want their wedding to be unique and you may not want to hear the same songs at your wedding that seem to have been played at every reception since the dawn of time. So what are your alternatives? In a future article I’m going to give you some very specific song ideas to encourage dancing and fun without being cliché. Today we will concentrate on what sort of atmosphere you would like to create.
You can definitely plan for how you want your reception to feel, but there are factors that will play a role in how easy it will be to achieve the atmosphere you desire. If you set your priorities on planning an elegant cocktail reception but you’re inviting 250 people and you know all of your college friends are going to get crazy, then you’re going to have a tough time; either your planning is going to be more involved to achieve just the right ambiance or you may have to alter your expectations. Alternately if you are working towards a reception that is very fun but you are planning the reception on a Sunday afternoon and only inviting 40 of your closest friends and relatives, then you should consider what it will take to keep a smaller group engaged and involved at a time when they might otherwise be doing yard work or just relaxing. This is not to say that you can’t achieve your vision under these circumstances, but it is going to take some extra work. The second example is what I want to talk about, because most couples want a fun reception and fun and elegant are not mutually exclusive. This is where I tie in the article that got us here. The author lists many wedding staples that she would rather never hear again. You may feel the same way about not only these songs but many more popular choices. You should set your priorities now:
- Do I want my guests to have fun?
- Do I want my reception to be unique?
- Do I want to avoid cliché songs?
- Do I want the DJ to avoid getting overly interactive?
I am not suggesting that you can not have a fun reception without a highly interactive DJ playing all of the wedding standards. What I am saying is decide now with your entertainer how they should proceed if your guests are not responsive to the music and entertainment. Have a ‘plan B.’ If you will be making a list of songs that you would like your DJ to play, then you may already be planning on starring your favorites. How about the ‘do not play’ list? Star the worst offenders that you absolutely do not want played, but then leave the rest of the list as songs you would rather avoid but will accept in the name of a successful event if that is what it takes to get your guests involved. Working with an entertainer that understands your goals is important, otherwise you can wind up with somebody who goes straight to the ‘rather avoid’ list when the going gets rough. Having said that, it should be noted that not all receptions are going to be the same. You may want to avoid all of the cheese cliché wedding songs altogether. I hinted above about the tendency of larger weddings to get wild. This is not always the case but it does work out that way more often then not. In these instances it is easier to find common ground between what you would like to hear at your reception and what your guests will be likely to dance to, even if your tastes lean towards the eclectic. The average age of the guests at your reception will also play a big part, as will the area where the majority of your guests hail from. The important thing to remember is that proper planning will ensure that you get what you want from your entertainment. A professional entertainer will take the time to get to know you and understand not only what you want, but the reasons for your choices. By understanding why you do or do not want something as part of your reception, they will be better equipped to make decisions at the reception that will contribute to your vision and not work against it.
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